Thursday, March 26, 2009
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Wednesday, March 25, 2009
A Wealthy Man
A very wealthy man had great wisdom and understood business. He enjoyed music and hired singers to entertain his guests at dinner parties and celebrations. He enjoyed laughter and surrounded himself with humorous people and enjoyed making others laugh.
Because his estate covered many acres, he hired landscapers to build pools and fountains in gardens filled with exotic flowers, tress and shrubs. On his property was a large forest and several acres of orchards from which he harvested fresh fruit for his guests.
He purchased works of art including vessels of gold and silver. He paid servants well to do his every bidding. His guests were from the royalty and rulers from distant nations. His political influence abounded without much effort because of his natural insight into human nature.
But as the years passed into decades and gravity began showing the marks across his face, he became depressed. His thoughts turned toward death and the fact that everyone dies, rich or poor, wise or foolish. The wealthy could not avoid it anymore than the poor. His fear and recognition of his own vulnerability began to haunt him.
He concluded life is not about eating, drinking, and possessions. It is about knowing God (Ecclesiastes 2; Romans 14:17).
Because his estate covered many acres, he hired landscapers to build pools and fountains in gardens filled with exotic flowers, tress and shrubs. On his property was a large forest and several acres of orchards from which he harvested fresh fruit for his guests.
He purchased works of art including vessels of gold and silver. He paid servants well to do his every bidding. His guests were from the royalty and rulers from distant nations. His political influence abounded without much effort because of his natural insight into human nature.
But as the years passed into decades and gravity began showing the marks across his face, he became depressed. His thoughts turned toward death and the fact that everyone dies, rich or poor, wise or foolish. The wealthy could not avoid it anymore than the poor. His fear and recognition of his own vulnerability began to haunt him.
He concluded life is not about eating, drinking, and possessions. It is about knowing God (Ecclesiastes 2; Romans 14:17).
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Increased Wisdom Increases Sorrow
The author of Ecclesiastes wrote, “For in much wisdom is much grief, and he who increases knowledge increases sorrow” (Ecc 1;18).
Our expectations are often unrealistic. We have the sense if we can solve a particular issue then life will be peaceful. We search for the time when there will be no more struggles for us, everything will come easily and we can relax. We are like the rich man who decided to build barns for his wealth and sit back and take it easy. The problem was that night he would die and all his riches would be left for others (Luke 12:15-21).
The longer we live the more we realize there will always be a problem to overcome and situation to resolve. The thought of that can depress us until we realize, for the believer, unprofitable circumstances do not exist. Every situation in our life will resolve to the glory of God (Ephesians 1:11-12).
Therein lies our hope.
Our expectations are often unrealistic. We have the sense if we can solve a particular issue then life will be peaceful. We search for the time when there will be no more struggles for us, everything will come easily and we can relax. We are like the rich man who decided to build barns for his wealth and sit back and take it easy. The problem was that night he would die and all his riches would be left for others (Luke 12:15-21).
The longer we live the more we realize there will always be a problem to overcome and situation to resolve. The thought of that can depress us until we realize, for the believer, unprofitable circumstances do not exist. Every situation in our life will resolve to the glory of God (Ephesians 1:11-12).
Therein lies our hope.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Bread, Fish, Eggs
Time is a treasure many of us seek to possess. When we pray, we want what we ask for to be given to us immediately. But Jesus said, “He who keeps on asking will receive what he asks for. He who keeps on seeking will find that for which he seeks. He who keeps on knocking shall have the door opened to him” (Luke 11:9-13). It is not a short process.
In the illustration Jesus uses, the son asks for bread, fish, and egg. He is searching for food to sustain life. We are to seek spiritual sustenance. Jesus says the Holy Spirit will be given to those who continually ask this from the Father.
I always want to know and understand now. When I ask, I want to receive immediately. I puzzle over God’s delays. I question my faith. I examine my heart. I wonder what is wrong with the way I am praying. The truth is simple; God will not relinquish his timing. I must continue to seek him while I patiently wait in faith.
(Luke 11:9-13)
In the illustration Jesus uses, the son asks for bread, fish, and egg. He is searching for food to sustain life. We are to seek spiritual sustenance. Jesus says the Holy Spirit will be given to those who continually ask this from the Father.
I always want to know and understand now. When I ask, I want to receive immediately. I puzzle over God’s delays. I question my faith. I examine my heart. I wonder what is wrong with the way I am praying. The truth is simple; God will not relinquish his timing. I must continue to seek him while I patiently wait in faith.
(Luke 11:9-13)
Friday, March 20, 2009
Repentance of Sexual Abuser
Why is sexual abuse of a child different than any other? Aren’t all sins alike?
No, the consequence of sin differs according to severity of the violation. Take for example the sins of gossip and murder. Gossip results in emotional pain for someone, murder costs a life.
Child sexual abuse costs a child his or her innocence, creates permanent feelings of fear, low self-esteem and interferes with intimacy in future adult relationships. The damage done by a sexual abuse never goes away.
Forgiveness of a child sexual abuser can never include trust with a child. If we do we are putting what we believe is the welfare of the abuser before the safety of the child. In essence we are sacrificing the child to the emotional desire of the abuser.
Sexual abuse is like an alcoholic. A person who has a physical dependence on alcohol can never have one drink. To stay sober, they must forever abstain from alcohol.
A sexual abuser has a deep seeded wound that draws him to the manipulation and abuse of children. God’s forgiveness takes that into consideration and requires the abstinence of being alone with a child.
A person who has truly repented from sexual abuse has no desire to be alone with children. They are fully aware of the potential and avoid the temptation at any cost. If the person you love who was a sexual abuser now requires that you trust him or her with children, the request is more about proving themselves than about the safety of the child. He or she has not fully grasped the seriousness of neither his or her actions nor the danger for themselves or the child.
No, the consequence of sin differs according to severity of the violation. Take for example the sins of gossip and murder. Gossip results in emotional pain for someone, murder costs a life.
Child sexual abuse costs a child his or her innocence, creates permanent feelings of fear, low self-esteem and interferes with intimacy in future adult relationships. The damage done by a sexual abuse never goes away.
Forgiveness of a child sexual abuser can never include trust with a child. If we do we are putting what we believe is the welfare of the abuser before the safety of the child. In essence we are sacrificing the child to the emotional desire of the abuser.
Sexual abuse is like an alcoholic. A person who has a physical dependence on alcohol can never have one drink. To stay sober, they must forever abstain from alcohol.
A sexual abuser has a deep seeded wound that draws him to the manipulation and abuse of children. God’s forgiveness takes that into consideration and requires the abstinence of being alone with a child.
A person who has truly repented from sexual abuse has no desire to be alone with children. They are fully aware of the potential and avoid the temptation at any cost. If the person you love who was a sexual abuser now requires that you trust him or her with children, the request is more about proving themselves than about the safety of the child. He or she has not fully grasped the seriousness of neither his or her actions nor the danger for themselves or the child.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Forgiving Sexual Abuse
News articles that carry the stories of sexual abusers cause our blood to boil. Voices are harsh and judgments are severe. But grief blindsides many who suddenly find themselves married to a sexual abuser. They hear the pleading of the abuser to forgive them and the scriptural instructions to forgive continually reverberates like the sound of a gong in their heads.
How do I forgive? How can I allow him to touch me again? Am I betraying my children by allowing this person in my bed? Am I betraying God by not forgiving?
Please consider the words of Jesus on the cross. “Father forgive them for they do not know what they are doing.” Jesus was pleading for those who did not comprehend their actions. Those words do not apply to the sexual abuser of a child. Their actions are intentional. They are fully aware that what they are doing is wrong.
Sexual abuse is about dominance, manipulation and self-fulfillment. It has nothing to do with a mistake but has everything to do with violating the innocent.
If you want to help a violator, you must make him or her face the consequences of their decision to put their desires above the health of a child. Because taking the risk of a repeat offense is too high, the one who chooses to sexually violate a child has forever lost the privilege of being trusted with children.
How do I forgive? How can I allow him to touch me again? Am I betraying my children by allowing this person in my bed? Am I betraying God by not forgiving?
Please consider the words of Jesus on the cross. “Father forgive them for they do not know what they are doing.” Jesus was pleading for those who did not comprehend their actions. Those words do not apply to the sexual abuser of a child. Their actions are intentional. They are fully aware that what they are doing is wrong.
Sexual abuse is about dominance, manipulation and self-fulfillment. It has nothing to do with a mistake but has everything to do with violating the innocent.
If you want to help a violator, you must make him or her face the consequences of their decision to put their desires above the health of a child. Because taking the risk of a repeat offense is too high, the one who chooses to sexually violate a child has forever lost the privilege of being trusted with children.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Forgiving a Child Abuser
Jesus made his opinion of a child abuser very clear. “Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it is better for him that a heavy millstone be hung around his neck, and that he be drowned in the depth of the sea” (Mathew 18:6).
Does that mean there is no forgiveness for a child abuser? No, but it does mean there are severe consequences when you know there has been physical or sexual abuse.
Abuse is about power, control, dominance and manipulation. It has nothing to do with love or desire for what is best for the victim. Such words are sugar coated excuses used to avoid taking responsibility for one’s actions. True repentance will include taking responsibility and a turning away from the behavior.
Because violent anger comes from deep psychological wounds, it is extremely important that the spouse require the violator to go through extensive professional counseling. In our economy we cringe at spending money and say we cannot afford it. But the parent who is not the abuser will need to examine his or her priorities. “Is my children’s safety more important than my need to be with this person?” “By staying in an abusive relationship am I also becoming an abuser by allowing this to continue?”
Jesus separated himself from abusers. Should we do any thing less?
Does that mean there is no forgiveness for a child abuser? No, but it does mean there are severe consequences when you know there has been physical or sexual abuse.
Abuse is about power, control, dominance and manipulation. It has nothing to do with love or desire for what is best for the victim. Such words are sugar coated excuses used to avoid taking responsibility for one’s actions. True repentance will include taking responsibility and a turning away from the behavior.
Because violent anger comes from deep psychological wounds, it is extremely important that the spouse require the violator to go through extensive professional counseling. In our economy we cringe at spending money and say we cannot afford it. But the parent who is not the abuser will need to examine his or her priorities. “Is my children’s safety more important than my need to be with this person?” “By staying in an abusive relationship am I also becoming an abuser by allowing this to continue?”
Jesus separated himself from abusers. Should we do any thing less?
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